brockvilleguest-list BLOGGER Mrs. Dragon Location

brockvilleguest-list BLOGGER Mrs. Dragon Location

2016-09-12 11:03

I talked about the upsides to a small wedding. I talked about how to get your guest list down to a smaller size. Now I’m going to deal with the aftermath, or what happens when people find out your wedding is tiny. Here’s what has worked for me so far, and what I hope will work in the future.

Use your network

In every family or group of people in general, there is the person who knows everything. The person you go to when you want to know what’s happening on Friday night. The person you tell if you’re trying to get a reunion or dinner up and running. That person is who you should, if possible, let know you’re having a small wedding. The word will spread through them, thus saving you from having to explain it over and over.

For instance, both of my parents know about our 50-person plans, and given that they’re the contact point for inquiring family members, I’m 90% sure most of the relatives on my side are aware of the situation. My bridesmaids know, too, which helps fend off questions from mutual friends. If people are upset they aren’t invited, your network will hopefully hear it before you do and spare you some of the backlash.

Facebook is not your friend

Remember when you were a teenager and your parents headed out of town for the weekend? You wanted to throw a party, but just with your five closest friends. But your blabbermouth buddy told five of his friends, and they told five of their friends, and all of a sudden your entire high school was in your house, breaking your mom’s lamps. (None of this ever happened to me in real life, by the way.)

Point is, Facebook is the loudmouth buddy of the internet world. If you write all over your social network about your wedding and how awesome it’s going to be, people will assume that if they can read about it, they can come. It puts you in the awkward situation of people you know aren’t invited enthusing on your wall about just how sweet your favours are going to be, and is kind of mean to the uninvited masses, if you think about it. Find another outlet for your sharing needs (like a blog!).

(I have to be honest and admit that I do write some wedding stuff on Facebook, but I recently created a wedding-only list that I’m going to try to stick with!)

Be blunt

Despite your network going to bat for you, and not blabbing on Facebook, you are likely still going to have to explain your choices to the people affected. For us,雨后的小风一吹, so far, that has meant an email explaining a person is not on our list, a phone call advising that a plus-one will only be given if it’s for a significant other that is actually significant, and a Facebook message explaining that assumed guests are actually not invited. People are going to ask, and you are going to have to answer, so pull off the Band-Aid and let them down. Don’t ignore it and hope it will go away.

Recognize the love

That being said, understand that in most cases people want to come because they love you, or they want to invite others because they want to share that love. For the most part, people aren’t trying to come to your wedding because they’re mean—they’re coming because they think you’re awesome and your wedding will be, too. So when you let people down, keep that in mind and try to do it nicely.

Offbeat Bride has a list of ways to point would-be guests in the right direction, some of which I plan to use if need be. If that doesn’t work, they also have a good list of ways to handle someone who just goes ahead and RSVPs, sans invite.

There’s still work to be done!

See, your guests that are invited and are coming may need a friendly reminder as to the lay of the guest-list land. They might slip and forget that you’re keeping things small. What I’ve done is post a few reminders on our website—first a little blurb on the front page, just reiterating that only invited guests should be at the ceremony and reception, and then a broader explanation on our questions page, explaining how and why we chose to cut our list down to 50. My reasoning was that if people understood our choice, in our own words, they’d be more likely to go along with it.

I don’t think it’s necessary to have a bouncer with an exclusive list posted at the door, and I don’t think we’re going to have wedding crashers. Everyone has been quite gracious and understanding of our particular situation so far. It’s a little more difficult to handle than inviting everyone we know and everyone we want to attend, but the extra effort is worth it to us for the variety of reasons I outlined when I explained how we got here in the first place.

What are your tips for dealing with uninvited guests? Has it been an issue for you,香港六彩开奖结果?

Tags: brockvilleguest-list BLOGGER Mrs. Dragon Location: Sioux Lookout/Brockville, ON Occupation: Journalist Wedding Date: September 2012 Venue: Mother of the Bride's residence --> PREVIOUS POSTGallery of the Day NEXT POSTThe Honeymooners Related Posts Planning from Afar03/28/16 @ 2:07 pm How We (Sort of) Kept Our Guest List Small03/25/16 @ 6:37 am Be Our Guests: The Horseshoe RSVP Breakdown05/20/16 @ 9:34 am A Preliminary Taste of Feather Pie: Our Wedding by the Numbers04/05/16 @ 2:25 pm